Of course, you'd have to let Jack be Jack for a totally successful gig.

That means allowing the guy to let loose with his obscenities. With maybe the exception of Samuel L. Jackson, no living actor has a greater command on the F-bomb than Jack. There would be a lot of bleeping, of course, but the television viewers would get it.

Ricky Gervais

No. 1: Ricky Gervais

Let's be honest, Ricky Gervais was a flop of epic proportions in his third and presumably final Golden Globes hosting gig a few years ago, but that doesn't make the man any less funny overall.

As much as the Golden Globes thinks it influences the Oscars, they still are small potatoes to the Motion Picture Academy -- which needs its Golden Boy to be a bit tarnished for going all high-art on us year after year with unexplainable nominations that wreak of a "we're smarter than you" attitude.

And who better to throw the dirt the statuette's way than the master mudslinger Gervais?

Of course, the Academy would know going in that they'd have a live-wire on their hands with Gervais, and as much as they'd try to muzzle his thoughts on over-privileged actors and the hypocrisies of Hollywood, he'd presumably do what he pleases.

The beauty is, he'd bring in big ratings, which is exactly what the Oscars need. And if Ricky is a winner (how could he NOT be?), the Academy would be forced to bring him back.